‘I’m bored!’ might be the best thing your child says

Even a few minutes free, and seven-year-old Arisha would be complaining and feeling restless. Surrounded by gadgets and weighed down by a packed schedule of school and extra classes, her rare free moments usually ended with the refrain: “I am getting bored.

”But is boredom really a waste of time, or can it be beneficial? Do children always need quick fixes, or should they learn to sit with empty moments? According to experts and parents, boredom can actually be a powerful brain booster.Content creator and mother of two, Simran Taneja, recalls: “One day, my daughter was whining as she had nothing to do, so I told her to figure it out herself without allowing her any gadgets or TV.

She went to the kitchen, and with the help of her didi, she prepared a full-fledged dinner for the whole family. The kitchen was a big mess, but she learned something and felt proud. That was the result of boredom.”

Over-stimulation by design

Millennial parents often encourage their kids to join multiple classes and activities in the name of cultivating competitiveness or due to FOMO (fear of missing out). But in this race, unstructured time gets lost.

Parenting expert Ishinna B Sadana, who has a PhD in Human Development, says, “Mostly, parents don’t think boredom is important. So, we take it as our responsibility to engage children, planning their day with multiple classes and work.

”Children, by nature, are curious explorers. When left with little to do, they look for ways to learn and play. “But the biggest problem is screen time. The child will ask for the phone or TV and parents end up giving in.

So, children never really understand the meaning of boredom,” Sadana adds.Some parents see this as a generational divide. “It’s funny how when we were kids, we were happy with imagining what shape the cloud resembles on a road trip, but for our kids we hand them an iPad for the sake of mental peace while in the car!” says Vani M Dhall, mother of a nine-year-old boy. “The problem is us as a generation and not the kids. We spent our childhood living up to our parents’ expectations and now spending our youth fulfilling our kids' demands.

”

Free time, free mind?

While boredom can be uncomfortable, it also sparks important self-reflection — about life, happiness, and sadness. In the long run, it can help children grow more creative, independent, and resilient.Taneja says, “Sometimes I just let them sit and get bored. It teaches patience and just pushes them to think of something on their own (even if it takes time). At times, I have to give them a little nudge and few choices — like ‘go paint, play with Lego, read a book or come help me in the kitchen.’

Most of the time, once they start, they end up enjoying it.”Even famous celebrities credit idle time for sparking ideas. In an interview with GQ magazine, actor Lin-Manuel Miranda said his free afternoons allowed his imagination free rein. “Because there is nothing better to spur creativity than a blank page or an empty bedroom,” he said.Research backs this up. The American Psychological Association notes that boredom acts as a motivator to seek new experiences.

Their study found that boredom “creates a seeking state that prompts people to explore new experiences, even if those experiences are hedonically negative.”Parenting experts emphasise the value of unstructured play. Mom of two, Deepti Chhabra, shares: “When my child says they’re bored, I don’t rush to fix it. Instead, I acknowledge their feelings and say something like, ‘That’s okay, let’s think of a new idea or activity we can do together.’

Then, I give them the space to figure out what they want to do. More often than not, we end up devising and enacting a new story or a completely new game with creative rules and twists.

”

She adds, “I believe it teaches them independence and creativity instead of relying on constant stimulation. When given unstructured time, my child has surprised me with imaginative play. Once, after being bored for a while, they turned a cardboard box into a ‘rocket ship’ and spent hours pretending to travel to space.

It was incredible to see how much storytelling and problem-solving happened without any gadgets or guidance.

”

Modelling boredom tolerance

Experts say understanding the reasons behind a child’s boredom matters — it could be linked to diet, lack of physical activity, or even emotional issues. Just as importantly, parents must model how to handle idle moments. “It’s not just children, the problem starts with adults. We have very little tolerance for boredom ourselves.

We are constantly on our phones. We are not sitting idle, so how will our kids do it? So, it’s important to have realistic expectations and model the right behaviour,” says Sadana.

She recommends about 30 minutes of unstructured play alongside a child’s daily routine.Even schools succumb to this temptation of making learning fun, writes Pamela Paul in The New York Times. “Teachers spend more time concocting ways to engage students through visuals and interactive learning (read: screens, games) tailored to their Candy Crushed attention spans.

Kids won’t listen to long lectures, goes the argument, so it’s on us to serve up learning in easier-to-swallow portions.”So next time your child says they’re bored, resist the urge to fill the silence. Let them sit with it. You never know what counting cows on a long car ride — or simply staring out the window — might inspire. At the very least, it teaches them to handle a life — and a future job — that isn’t always packed with entertainment.