Being married is a part of my life; it is not my entire life: Trina Saha

Actor Trina Saha opened up about the role that shaped her career, why she prioritises quality over quantity, her approach to work and criticism, dealing with personal struggles, and the constant speculation around her marriage with Neel Bhattacharya.

In a candid conversation with Calcutta Times, she also spoke about being an introvert, embracing vulnerability, and why she believes in moving on instead of seeking revenge.Let people speculate. Neel and I are not divorced. Being married is part of my life, not my entire identity. What Neel means to me is between us – it doesn’t need public validation : TrinaBuy yourself a luxury car, have popcorn and let God do the rest : Trina

What’s a role or project in the last 10 years that pushed you the most as an actor?My first megaserial Khokababu made me who I am today. It gave me the push to become an actor. The sets were like my acting school, and Snehashish da (Chakraborty) was my guide. My character, Tori Mukherjee, taught me the nuances of acting. Learning is an ongoing process. Even today, every day on the set of Parashuram is an opportunity to evolve.

You’ve been selective with projects. Should quality take precedence over quantity?Quality is definitely more important. Of course, one has to run a family and pay EMIs—money is a necessity. But constantly taking up work just for cheques can lead to burnout, which reflects in performance. At this stage in my career, quality matters more.You shoot extensively for endorsements and serials. Does that affect performance?I don’t agree that I don’t do justice to my work. Commitment is a responsibility. There have been overwhelming phases, especially during Durga Puja. I once reshot a brand campaign without commercials because I looked visibly tired.

That made me reflect. If I can’t give my best, I’d rather not take up the work.

You are on your 7th serial. Do you find it monotonous?Serials can be monotonous, but they provide financial stability. That said, I’ve been fortunate to work with strong writers. My character Totini Ganguly in Parashuram has multiple layers, and her evolution keeps things exciting.By education, I’m a Company Secretary and an MBA. Even in corporate roles, you repeat tasks daily.

If something makes you happy and gives satisfaction, you continue doing it—that’s my mantra.Why don’t we see you in more films?I’ve done films and believe I’m capable, but perhaps directors and producers feel I won’t bring business. I hold no grudge—when the right roles come, I’ll do them.

What’s next?Apart from my current serial, there’s nothing in the pipeline. I’d rather be honest than pretend otherwise.Have there been phases without work?Yes, I didn’t have work for one and a half years. During that time, I had just bought a house for my parents.

But I believe if your intent is good, things fall into place—with time and patience.Your take on actors being forced into political appearances?No one can be forced. I’ve attended political gatherings willingly, out of respect. It’s a personal choice, and standing by it reflects integrity.

How do you handle public criticism?If an actress, rather a woman buys a house, drives a nice luxury car or lands a good project, there is often an assumption that she must have achieved it through the ‘wrong’ means.

Very rarely do people acknowledge the years of hard work, sacrifices and perseverance that go into building a successful career for a woman. It’s really sad… At the same time we don’t give people the right to assassinate our characters. Many who do this are jobless or uneducated and don’t realise we could take legal action.

But we have a lot of work, stress and families to take care of. We just don’t have the time to give them that attention, though we can if we want to.

Was owning a luxury car a dream?Of course. Owning a luxury car and gifting a house to my parents were both dreams.It seems the steering wheel of your life is firmly in your own hands. How do you deal with professional and personal struggles?Oh yes, the steering wheel of my life is firmly in my hands, and I take full responsibility for every choice I make-the good, bad and the ugly. Everyone is fighting their own battles, so I believe you should do what makes you happy and stop judging others because you never truly know what someone else is going through.

We can’t stop the rain from falling, but whether we choose to get drenched in it or simply let it pass-that choice is entirely ours.

A few school friends, but my team—stylist, manager, hair and makeup artists—are my biggest support system.

A song that reflects your current state of mind?Main Heroine Hoon from Heroine. Every woman is the heroine of her own story.What do people get wrong about you?People think I’m intimidating, rude, or snooty. I used to be affected, but I’ve realised I’m an introvert.

My close friends know the real me.Do you cry when you feel low?Yes, I cry. But I don’t dwell on the same pain. I don’t allow anything to affect my peace or work repeatedly. Your talent, education, and values are your real strengths.

You didn’t post for Neel’s birthday?I did wish him. Not everything needs to be posted. Social media is a choice.But you used to post earlier?Yes, but people change. Every year, situations, priorities, and expressions evolve.You weren’t at his birthday party?Neel’s happiness matters. He celebrated the way he wanted, and I’m happy about that.Grudges or moving on? The latter says TrinaJust because someone has wronged you, does that mean you have to do something bad to him/her? I am not that kind of person. That person has done something wrong and he/she knows it. Trust me, guilt makes people feel much worse than revenge ever can. I know that person has hurt me.

That person knows very well what he/she did to me and how much pain it caused me. So let it remain between the two people involved-the guilt and the hurt.

I don’t want to create a scene by telling four other people about it. Dignity matters. Your self-respect matters. If I tell four other people about it, they cannot cry my tears for me. When I couldn’t sleep all night, no one could help me sleep. So, when nobody can help me in that scenario, why should they be a part of my grief? You know what becomes problematic? Suppose you and I have had a fight. Then after one-two years, if someday we reconcile, you will look like a clown in front of all those people you have involved. You will end up making fun of yourself.

If I can’t give my best to a role or endorsement, I’d rather not take it up at all : TrinaEarlier, I used to react instantly to things, but with time, I’ve become much calmer. I’ve realised that reacting to everything is simply a waste of time and energy. I’ve also become a deeply spiritual person. I believe many things in life are already written, and the only thing we can truly control is our response to them : TrinaPix: Anindya Saha; Makeup: Kaju Guha; Hair: Aamrapali; Styled by: Sampurna Dey; Location: Tribe, Golpark