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1 week ago
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Tanishaa Mukerji on not having her mother around as a child (Source: Instagram/Tanishaa Mukerji)
Tanishaa Mukerji’s reflection on her childhood highlights the emotional challenges of having a working mother. While financial responsibilities often drive parents to juggle multiple jobs, children may struggle with feelings of loneliness and a lack of emotional connection.
During a recent interview with Hauterrfly, the actor said, “My mom was a working woman, but I wish she wasn’t. Jab mera janam hua, tab mummy ko kaam karna pada humare family ko support karne ke liye, kyuki paisa uss waqt kam tha. Bahut logo ko nahi pata lekin mummy 2-3 shift karti thi ek dinn mein. And main kabhi unse milti nahi thi, lekin main mummy ke room mein soti thi taaki mujhe woh mummy ka feel aa jaata tha. You know ki mom is there. Woh paanch baje subhe uthke jaati thi toh isilye meri memories aise hai mummy ke. I feel that it’s amazing that you are a working woman, but I just feel that women should be at home with their children because only a mother can really teach the child, bring up the child, and give the child the nurturing that they need. Woh sirf maa se aata hai.”
“I’m not a very big thing of like, leave your child at home and go to work, I mean yes some women want to do it. But I feel that if you’re going to have a child, give that child the first five years of your life. Woh de do apne bachche ko. Uske baad aapko kaam karna hai karo. Par woh pehle paanch saal bas kuch mat karo, bachche ke saath raho,” stated Mukerji.
She added how, to this day, she is clingy when it comes to her mother, Tanuja. “Main bahut clingy hu mere mummy ke saath. I’m a very clingy person. Jab main chhoti thi toh mere mama (uncle) mujhe tease karte the ki yeh chhodegi nahi. Main chhodti nahi thi jab bhi mummy mere paas hoti thi toh main literally cling karti thi. And even now, that is still inside me. It has come from my childhood of her, woh kaam pe jaati koi choice nahi tha. Toh that feeling of being left is still inside me.”
How does a parent’s prolonged absence during childhood impact emotional development, and can these effects be reversed later in life?
Psychologist Anjali Gursahaney tells indianexpress.com, “Children with absent parents, whether physically or emotionally, may develop insecure attachment styles, leading to difficulties with trust, self-worth, and relationships later in life. Parental presence plays a crucial role in teaching emotional regulation, as children often look to their parents for cues on managing their feelings.”
In some cases, she adds, other caregivers, mentors, or siblings can help fill these emotional gaps, mitigating the negative impact. While early experiences shape an individual, healing is possible through therapy, self-awareness, and intentional efforts such as inner child work and building secure adult relationships, allowing for the reversal of emotional wounds.
Strategies for working parents to maintain emotional connection
Gursahaney suggests the following:
- Quality Over Quantity: Even short but meaningful interactions — like bedtime storytelling, weekend traditions, or personal rituals — can strengthen bonds.
- Tech-Assisted Presence: Video calls, voice notes, and digital check-ins help children feel connected.
- Active Listening & Validation: Making children feel heard when they share something (without distraction) builds trust.
- Involvement in Daily Life: Asking about their day, involving them in decision-making, and creating shared experiences help maintain closeness.
English (US) ·