Radhika Apte recalls losing a major film after gaining weight on vacation, ‘They said, 'This is so fat'... It triggered years of anxiety’

Radhika Apte has opened up about one of the most defining and painful moments of her early career—being removed from a major film after gaining a few kilos during a vacation. In a candid conversation with India Today, the actor traced how that incident planted deep-seated anxiety around weight, ageing, and appearance in an industry obsessed with surface-level perfection.

‘They freaked out and dropped me’

Recalling the episode, Apte revealed that the project had originally been written for her. Confident in her body and health at the time, she had informed the makers that she wouldn’t be dieting during her trip. “I was offered a huge project; it was written for me. I went on a trip, and I told them I’m not going to be on a diet. I might come back a few kilos heavier, but I’ll lose it. I was young, my metabolism was great, I was a dancer, I didn’t need to lose weight,” she told India Today.What followed was crushing. “I came back and they freaked out. They did a photoshoot with me, sat with my photographs, and said, ‘This is so fat.’ And they dropped me like this,” Apte recalled. The film went on to become a major hit and helped launch the careers of the actors who replaced her. “For some three or four kilos, I lost out on an opportunity that would have changed my career,” she added, admitting it took years to fully process the loss.

How the incident triggered weight anxiety

The impact of that experience lingered far beyond the professional setback. Apte confessed that it triggered weight anxiety she had never felt before. “Sometimes it really bothers me—the weight fluctuations, swellings, this, that. I won’t lie to you, it does. I feel like, ‘Oh, I need to lose the weight that I’ve put on.’ I keep thinking of it all the time,” she said. What troubled her more was that the anxiety clashed with her own beliefs.

“I never had this problem before. And I was like, where is it coming from? Because it doesn’t sit with my value system. I believe in natural beauty, and I always will stand by it.”

Seeking therapy

Therapy eventually helped her connect the dots between that early rejection and her later insecurities. With distance and reflection, Apte now views the incident differently. “That was such a blessing in disguise. Later, I realised that shaped who I am today.

It made me stronger. I can now say with more power that I’m not going to adhere to these notions. I’m not going to conform to your ideas of beauty,” she asserted.

Choosing to show up unapologetically on screen

That resolve shows in the choices she makes today. Apte revealed that she shot two films just three months after giving birth, refusing to shrink herself for the camera. “I was three months postpartum when I shot two films. I am bigger than I’ve ever been. And I was like, I’m going to be on camera, and I’m going to proudly be on camera.

And I did it,” she said, calling out the mental health cost of impossible standards. “These horrendous and impossible beauty norms, the insecurities, the obsession with age—it’s for everybody’s mental health.

It really is.”

On ageing and the double standard

She also highlighted the stark double standard around ageing in cinema. “When men age, they’re ageing like fine wine. When women age, they’re just older. They’re not treated the same way, are they?” Apte remarked, adding that society’s fear of ageing is deeply misplaced. “We’re so scared of ageing. My God, it’s the one thing you can’t change. The way we perceive beauty now is so superficial, so shallow—we’re really not in a good spot.

”Radhika Apte was last seen in Tisca Chopra’s directorial Saali Mohabbat, which is currently streaming on ZEE5.