What parents say that makes kids quit sports early, according to tennis legend Billie Jean King

What parents say on the sidelines or in the car ride home can matter more than they realize. According to tennis legend Billie Jean King, there’s one common mistake parents make that quietly pushes kids away from sports, and it often comes from a place of love, not harm.Many parents think they’re being supportive when they ask questions like, “Did you win?” or “Why didn’t you score?” or “You could’ve done better there, right?” But to a child, especially a young one, these comments can feel like pressure instead of encouragement. Over time, that pressure adds up. What started as fun slowly turns into stress. And eventually, kids decide it’s just not worth it.Billie Jean King has seen this happen again and again, both as an athlete and as someone who has spent decades around young players.

She believes that when parents focus too much on results, performance, or comparison, kids stop playing for joy and start playing to avoid disappointing someone else. And that’s when the love for the game fades.In a show SiriusXM’s LIFT, a new show on SiriusXM’s Stars, the tennis legend spoke about how her parents shaped her and her brother Randy's career. “They never asked Randy or me if we won,” she said in the show.“If they picked us up in the car, or when we walked through the door at home, they didn't say, ‘Did you win?’ And parents do that a lot.

And most young people, they're finding, around 10, 11 years old, will quit their sport or sports because they don't feel they can live up to their parent’s ambition for them,” the 39 time Grand Slam Champion added.Kids don’t experience sports the way adults do. For them, it’s about having fun, being with friends, moving their bodies, and feeling good about trying. When every match turns into an evaluation, or every mistake is dissected, it takes the joy right out of it.

Even well-meaning advice can feel overwhelming when it’s constant.King stresses that what kids need most isn’t technical feedback from parents, they already get that from coaches. What they really need is emotional safety. They need to know that their worth isn’t tied to a scoreboard. Whether they win, lose, or sit on the bench, they’re still supported.

Power of manifestation

The 81 year old is a strong believer of manifestation. “People keep thinking, you learn more from failure,” the 81-year-old tennis legend told Fortune at a sports summit.

She agrees that there is a power in believing. “If you think you’re a failure, you’ll fail. If you think you’re a winner, you’ll win,” the former American tennis player said. Sports can teach kids resilience, teamwork, and confidence, but only if the environment supports that. When parents focus on enjoyment, effort, and personal growth, kids are far more likely to stick with sports for the long run.Sometimes, staying quiet on the sidelines or offering a simple “I loved watching you play” is the best support of all.